Grief and Creativity

I find it interesting what we do to cope with grief.

And we all experience grief at some time in our lives... in diverse situations... many of them life-changing... divorce, death, jobs, children... Grief for the hopes or dreams... the way things were... the way we wanted them to be.

In the midst of the outer chaos, some of us find creative ways to express the inner chaos and help ourselves to find healing.

There are so many ways creativity helps us through our grief. That time when we seldom have the energy to concern ourselves with others' feelings or needs, we are able to heal and come back to ourselves through repetitive moments of creating.

I would think that the wordsmith in me could find the words to express the turmoil. Yet, when people call or express a desire to help, I utterly lack the grace or energy, or ability to say much. There are too many emotions. It's too difficult to explain the depth of the feelings... the private ache of personal grief. So much easier to just say "thank you."

During my grief, I just crave being silent and alone. And during my grief, I am driven to create something.

My husband, Pete, has learned over the years to just go with it. He brings me nourishment and beverage and allows me time to make and process. Sometimes for days and sometimes for weeks. He is ever kind to me and ready with a silent hug.

Several of the murals in my home show the results of my inner processing. Something about the stroke of a brush... the blending of color... the pouring of an emotion onto a surface... incredibly soothing and calming.

Then there are the quilts. Crazy, unplanned, chaotic quilts. Taking an old fragment of material and sewing it onto a larger piece wherever it fits. Making something old or worn or scrap into something beautiful and useful and warm. The steady sound of the sewing machine, the up and down of the needle, meditative and calming, just continues on and on.

There stand many a garden in testament to grief. Angrily pulling weeds, tenderly planting seedlings. All the while watching plants grow or gathering the harvest. That feeling of a lasting monument to growth and change.

So many creative ways to express grief and work through the cycles. Music, dance, painting, sculpting, writing, sewing, photography, doodling, exercising, traveling, weaving ... so very many diverse mediums... all to make and create in our grief.

And to rely on when holidays or changing seasons bring grief to visit once again.

However you choose, at whatever stage you find yourself, may your creativity bring you comfort and peace.